how not because they’re mad nor sad but

how it is?

 A rare season is coming to town, now the lights
look like fireflies, shining the whole time, and continuously hearing the same
song that is now stuck in my head.

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All are happy
but some are not, for a different reasons that were kept locked inside a silent
heart full of emptiness

Christmas will
come, but not everybody seems to be excited, not because they’re mad nor sad
but something is missing for someone is not around.

Someone is not
around, I guess it was the reason, missing someone for a while that is not
around seems lost and like a gift that perishes together as the seasons change.

All seasons used
to be merry but what had come was weary, a season that used to be worthy will
now leave nothing but memories.

 I shed tears for ache and pain, I guess I’m
not going to pretend behind these words, what I really wanted to say was,
you’re gone and it hurts, and it is Christmas, it hurts more



at the sky with nobody, those perfect beautiful creations, that lovely smile of
the crescent moon that makes me smile.

The wind breeze in this silent evening as I see those tiny fireflies
flying around the trees like the stars up above that I can’t resist, but staying
for a while reminds me of him, the guy I love


Once I loved and
live happily, everything was fine and not weary, but now, what happened to me?
I am left with nothing and lonely.

 Here now, all this pain keeps burning but no
one seems to notice. This pain keeps my heart breaking like a falling glass,
shattered into pieces

Memories remain as  memories,
my mind keeps on asking how it happened. It is all over, and there is no way I
can take it back, so I’m just here mourning here and crying my lungs out









of love)

I told myself
not to write when I’m sad, it’s not my genre, nor my style, it’s not me at all.

I have to write
a beautiful one, a piece full of joy, laughter, rejoicing and love…

I don’t want to
write a piece out of nothing, dull, empty, lonely and sad

 It should be optimistic, jolly, passionate and
with care.

 It shouldn’t be negative, tired, nonsense and

. It must use flowery,
magical, and admiring words.

 no words that is dead, dark and sensitive.

 it should give life not death.

 it should make the reader in love not hurt.

it should be
true and innocent not lies nor deceiving.

 No I’m not like that, I will never write that
kind of piece.

So, maybe I’ll
stop this now, because I don’t want to do it.

but I felt it.

 No, it’s wrong

I should not.

I cannot.

must not